Pickles
Old people. Old style. Always a joke about finding the TV remote.
Mister Boffo
I can't tell you. I really can't tell you. 
Pearls Before Swine
Elaborate joke and the guy spends the entire panel setting it up. The whole time I'm reading it I'm thinking It better be worth it, bub.
Prince Valiant 
Ignore it for 20 years and you can still catch up.
Marvin 
Basically just baby life. But babies with big heads are cute.
Ziggy 
Once in a blue moon, they'll have words. Or he says, “I'm Ziggy.” and people say, "Yes, you are." And he's always getting visited by aliens.
Hi and Lois 
Family life from not modern time. I think it's from like the 1960s, but I don't know why it's a cartoon. Makes me think we need new cartoons. Still, we always fight over who is Hi and who is Lois.
Arlo and Janis
A married couple with a cat that says he will rule the world.
Dog eat Doug. 
Like Marvin but with better art. Obscure pop culture references, like the only way you'll get it is if you like Assassin's Creed. It's like a secret joke for five people.
Zits 
Always over exaggerated teenage problems. But it cracks my mom up and she shouts out loud, “Did you read Zits today? God I love that mom!”  
Baldo My mom loves this one. She says it makes her feel comfortable.
Garfield 
Always sight gags, which are fun sometimes. Especially when Garfield is mean to the dog.
Curtis
Curtis is hard work. A lot of words. Has like a billion words, maybe two billion.
Between Friends 
50 something year old ladies and another one that my mom loves and screams "HOW TRUE IT IS!"
Get Fuzzy 
Too many words. Super complicated jokes about political process. And dogs. And Cats. I think they're metaphors for complicated issues. I think.
Sally Forth 
This is the one with all the words. This is the worst. All the words. So many words. Reminds me I was wrong when I used to think that comics were for kids.
Mother Goose & Grimm 
So weird. I can't even understand it. How do cartoons get picked? I want to know. Because I think I could do cartoons if my brother drew the pictures. 
Mutts 
Always about environment or PETA. Super elaborate drawings. Only fun if you like animals. A lot.
Foxtrot
This is the only one I don't mind reading. The other ones are painful.
Grand Avenue 
A reverse of Pickles.  
Family Circus 
From the times when ice cream truck treats were like a quarter and not 5 dollars. We need modern cartoons.
Doodles 
So easy brain tricks and riddles that my mom gets them. They need to have optical illusions, alas—they do not!
You Can 
Science facts This is cool. Experiment stuff and actual things you learn.
Beetle Bailey 
He's been in the military at the same rank for the past 50 years because he refuses to do the exercises he's supposed to. He loafs around which is why he stays skinny and at the same rank.
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