The Pied Piper of Toothville

Monday, and Baby E posts.

Routines. Routines are good. They lend sanity and framework to 3 boys on the loose. In the summer. 3:1.
It's Monday, Baby E's post day: He's glad to be back and has lots to tattle ... ummm ... "say" about his time away. He missed you all!!

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First: This is me.
My mom says we still have to do work, even if it is summer. That doesn't make any sense because if you don't have to do school, then you shouldn't have to do work, either. That's what I think. My mom says we can't grow up to be lazy or no one will marry us. She says that all the time.

This is me having to sweep the planters. I think that's a dumb job. But she says I have to do it because I said no to the other choices, too. She says you have to pick something and I said but I don't like what you're giving me to choose. And then she says what she always says about stuff, "Well, then, I'll choose for you." So, I said, "okay okay, I'll sweep the planters." But I don't think I should have to do all of them.

Next, I went on vacation.
Every day I said how much fun it was. Next week, I want to show you a picture of the deepest deepest hole I made on the beach. I dug until I got to water. It was up to my waist when I stood in it. And there was water in the bottom of the hole that stayed there and didn't sink away into the sand.

This is about what I found in the kitchen.
My mom makes me "Lucky Charm" toast. It's toast in the shape of a lucky charm because I like Lucky Charms cereal, too. Anyway, she always make me my toast in that shape and then one day when I look at the dishes I saw a lucky charm cookie cutter and grabbed it and said "so this is how you do it!" and her face went sad and she said, "no! I wanted you to not know my secret!" and her face really did look sad so I told her I could wipe it off the face of my brain with my hand and not remember it. And she said, "really?" and I told her I really could.


This is about my idea:
This one morning I was really tired and when my mom woke me up for my summer classes I said I needed my rusty body oil. And she said, "what?" and I said, "I'm going to first need my warming up oil, then my moving oil. Oil me up, mom, like a rusty robot so I can move."

This is the last story I can say:
My mom likes to put toothpaste on my flute!
I like to take my electric toothbrush and put it in my mouth sideways and pretend it's a flute by rubbing the hard part against my teeth. It works. And then I'll hear my mom come stomping up the stairs to check on me to make sure I'm ready and she catches me playing with my flutebrush and she'll say, "you're supposed to be getting ready" and then she puts toothpaste on my flute and I say, "you're putting toothpaste on my flute" and she says, "yeah, well, the pied piper called and wants his flute back, so brush your teeth" and when she does stuff like that I don't want to laugh, but then I laugh and then I can't be mad and sometimes I want to stay mad and not laugh. But I always laugh, even when I don't want to.

Next week I'll have my picture of the big hole I made..."oh, wait,mom! Can I do one more story?"

O.K. I got really hurt in my games class last week. A kid's skull went hard into my mouth and I had to go to the dentist. I'm better now.

Bye.

Baby Villa

Monday already. I hope Baby Villa can make Mondays a bit better for you. The routine here today: He Speaks, I Type. Welcome to Baby E's Post of The Week:

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Hi. I have a lot in my notes for today. I don't know what to say first. That makes me be quiet. My mom says to just look at my notes and stick to that order, but I want to say the other stuff first. Can I, Mom? OK. She says we'll try it for awhile with me just talking....mom...I feel mixed up again.

OK. We'll do the notes. We went to a graduation party for my mom's friend's daughter and this is an exciting story. There are lots of parts to it. The first part is you need to know this part.

I was in our paper! Our paper did a story on me that was almost the whole page and they called me "web phenom." A lady came to the house and asked me questions. I asked my mom if I behaved and she said yes. I asked her for a prize for behaving, and she said no.

At this party, this lady said, "hey...I read about you today." And my body was bursting with proud, and I wanted to say braggity stuff. But I knew I couldn't. I said, "that was me." And that was all. But inside I wanted to and wished I could have done my backwards robot dance and said, "uh huh oh yeah uh huh." But I knew not to. And you can't brag, either.

I found a newspaper thing my mom cut out of the paper and thinks she secretly hid in the cabinets on how to not spoil your kids. I saw it and said, "mom. now your tricks won't work cuz I found this!" And I grabbed the paper and showed her. She just laughed. But I'm going to watch her for tricks like not buying me stuff. And like that.

I like to wear my big brother's white shoes and pretend they're clown shoes. My mom always laughs for that.

My mom is teaching me cursive. I have learned a lot of tricks. This one is important: if you make your small t sides too apart it will look like an a. The small t sides need to touch.

My mom makes me wear my summer socks and I don't like them. I can't say hate. But I don't like them A LOT. They are small and white and have no tops on them so they look like little baby shoes. I don't like them.

I have more stuff written down but my mom says only one more story. I have 6 more stories. I have to pick one.

Tonight we rented Astroboy and the dad was mean to the kid in it. I've noticed that in kid's movies lately, there is always a person that crushes that kid's dreams. The kid in the movie's dreams. Like in Toy Story, they say, "you can't play guitar" how do they know that? You have to tell the kid that he can and then he will.

Next week I will tell you about this dog I want. It is so unspeakably cool you couldn't even describe it in words. I want a dog like that. He was at the graduation party.

Bye.

I See The Future

SETTING:

Books on living room floor, all open, Baby E. skimming and poring through the new picture history books on Latin American history. We'll be studying this over the summer, as well as learning more about how we came to live in this country and about Baby E's heritage. Baby E. is fascinated with the fact that he is Hispanic. [I am first generation American, and my family is from South America.] I think my exact words were, "My blood runs through your veins! My people are your people! My ancestors are within your DNA! Your future comes from your past! It is who you are and who you will be and I am you and you are me and Viva! Simon Bolivar!....", (pant pant wiping sweat from brow)......words along those lines.



"Hey, Mom, I really like these history books you got us for the summer. They're so neat and cool."

"I'm so glad you like them, Baby E. We're going to learn more about my family, and you, and how you're part of my family from South America. I love history, too."

"Yeah, like, mom, this book here? It's ultracool because there's even a picture in here of me and what I'm going to look like when I grow up..."

"Wait, what? Baby E., let me see that...what are you looking at?"

"See, right here, mom, this guy...."


Baby E excitedly walks over a copy of The Mexican Revolution, for grades 6-9., holds it up for me to see,

open to this page:




Pancho Villa, Mexican Revolutionary


"Mom? Mom? Are you laughing or crying, mom? Mom????"

Uglydoll and Other Stuff That Kids Will Love

It's Monday, and Baby Emperor's post day. Last week, he promised a Summer Shopping List. I was in charge of R&D, specifically transportation and finance. He speaks, I type:

Hi. This is Baby E now. Today we're going to go through my list of stuff. My mom says I have to explain what I talk about first.

What my mom does when we're done with school, is the day after we're done, in the morning, she fills a basket for me and my brothers with stuff. Mostly books, like these Uglydoll books.

She gets us the stuff first, and then when we wake up and come downstairs in the morning, the basket is there for all of us with a note about summer. She makes us read the note first. And keep it. It's most of all books for the summer, but she puts in fun stuff for when it's late or cold or raining or boring. We keep the basket in the front room or classroom all summer. We call it the Summer Fun Basket and it makes the first day of vacation fun. I love getting our basket. I wake up super early when I know it's the day of the basket.

We went to the store yesterday with my notebook, and we walked around and wrote down what I hope is in my basket and stuff we liked. She said I could pick out some stuff for me for my basket.

*There's a rule now that we have to say that no one gave us money to buy this stuff or tell you about it. That's true. No one did give us money, and we have to pay for what we buy with my mom's money. No one gave us any stuff.*

First, books. This Ugly doll book comes with 4 of them, a set, but you can buy them like only one. And they're really cool. They're funny and so funny you will laugh. Even my big brothers laugh, and my mom laughs. They really are funny and only 5 dollars, right, mom? And you get to see all the cool Ugly dolls. They're easy to read. The website, but it has to be the official one, is fun.

I'll only do some stuff today because I found 3 pages on my journal of stuff I want. So, I'll only do, like one page, of stuff I want.

Well, and there's these Diary of a Wimpy Kid books, and they're ridiculously funny. They have stick people pictures that are funny. They're easy to read, and the words are funny. This website is funny, too.

Any maze books. All kinds of them.

New swimming goggles that match my new style. No more babyish shark ones.

Gear battery bubble maker with a gigantic bottle of bubble stuff. That is fun all the time.

Velcro ball and mitt set.

Soccer balls.

Basketball that glows in the dark.

Any sprinklers, and lots of them, so you don't get bored. Buy all the fun ones.It's fun to use more than one at a time.

Glow in the dark frisbees.

This big orange bike that I saw that I know I won't get, but I still want it. It was awesome. It's my favorite color. It matches my new style. The reason I want is because the bike I have was my 2 brothers' bikes already.

A new bike helmet that matches me now, I don't want my one with fish on it anymore.

Quirkle board game.

The new colored Connect 4 game.

Digital battery drumsticks that play drums in the air. I really want that. I really want that, hear me, mom?

PixO's making kits.

All the Bendaroos kits.

All the Backyardigan DVD's.

Mario Brothers for Wii.

Nintendo games of Starfy, and Kirby.

SpyGear night goggles.

SpyGear Micro ear gear.

Any Legos set. Especially the Atlantis ones.

Battle Strikers Turbo Tops.

More sidewalk chalks with the stencils that come with them. My mom buys us gardening kneeling pads for our knees for outside.

Any water Slip-n-Slides. My mom calls them Slip-n-Dies.

Any water blaster guns. Especially SuperSoaker. All kinds so your friends can have some when they come over.

Any Nerf guns. Get lots of them so your friends have some when they come over.

A pool.

A snow cone maker with lots of syrups. Get 4 packs and all the flavors.

Model Magic presto-dots. They make cool monsters.

I like card games, like Blink.

A pop-up tent or tipi for outside for when you want to lay outside and play and have shade. And for having lunch, too, or popsicles.

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That's my list. I hope I get some stuff I really want in the basket.


And, also, ...I don't like my mom's summer pajamas. They look like she just had a tonsillectomy. I had one, and my adenoids, too, and they made me wear a dress like that!

Sometimes I like to hang extra long floss to go from between and across my teeth so the strings hang down the sides of my jaw and walk around to my brothers and say "I'm a nutcracker."

Look in the mirror. You really do look just like one, but you have to make your jaw go up and down at the same time.

Bye. Next time I will tell you about the baby socks my mom makes me wear.

Next week I'm going to tell you that funny stuff.

Bye.

What A Poet Will Tell You

Our middle son, Maximus (now 13), at SeaWorld, when age 4.




I hear his coaches shout "get in the game" and "go after the ball"

I cringe knowing the shouts are directed at him

And I sit in silent anger at myself for putting him here

Giving into the pressure of "You've got to push him"

He'd rather show them there's no reason to

"hustle" and shove, and yell so loud

When there are so many other ways to be

That are easier to be.

When told "get in there and win" he'll ask if it

Matters who wins, if everyone gets a chance to play?

Too soon, he tires of the ball being kicked, and the legs that fly at

You with no warning

Of the elbow that pushes to get at the ball they all want, with shouts of "over here!"

He'll hear someone call his name, barely, but he can't pull away from where his

Attention is drawn

His face looks up to the dandelion wishes that are floating in the morning's soft wind, swirling up

In slow circles,

Scattering seeds away from the field where they play

He wants them to see what he now sees, but they won't want to hear, he's learned that slowly,

By trying before

He stands by himself at the end of the field, as they all run past him, in the opposite direction

Away from the sun that warms the weightless feathery puffs that circle up

As I watch him, my heart aches from seeing in his face that he is beginning to know the truth

Already and that

It will be me that slowly has to tell him, year by year,

That he will have to wait for the time when people will want to hear the words that the poet's

Heart wants to shout.

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I wrote this many years ago, when our now 13 year old naturalist son, Maximus, played his first season of soccer when he was about 4.

I'm happy to tell you that since this was written, our son's poetry has gone on to win Grand Prize in our regional area Nature Poetry Contest.

He's also received many a blue ribbon for placing 1st with his art entries at our local County Fair. Maximus submitted an original design Xmas tree ornament that was accepted as the official Governor's Tree Xmas Tree Ornament at our state capitol. He designed the Xmas Card that was selected as our School District's official Holiday Card.

And the list goes on..... 


*I apologize for the seemingly haphazard breaks, but Blogger has been messin' with my mind again. It all looks good in preview, but something happens to the layout after "Publish Post."