Monday, May 17, 2010

Why I Don't Wear My SpiderMans Anymore....


It's Monday. He's up, he's got his notes from the week, and we're ready to go.

Baby E., on his world this week. His speaks, I type, since I'm the one with the mad keyboard skills. (srsly) You should see my fingers fly.
----------------------------------------------------------------
BABY E:

So, let's go, it's kind of a long list this week. It'll take kinda like 10 seconds to go through.

First, I have to tell you about this picture. I do not like my Spidermans anymore. I liked them a lot when this picture was taken, but not now. When I found out why they were so bad. Well, they're kinda...well, this picture is from when I liked them and they're babyish now. My mom is sad I won't wear them. But, so, now she took me to get new pajamas. I'll show you next week. And guess what? The new pajamas I have now make me feel like a teenager. You'll see.

The next thing I wrote in my journal for ideas ( My mom says,"go get your diary" and I whisper back, "It's not a diary, it's a journal"). :

The next big story is about beetles. Asian beetles.

The invasion of the asian beetles.
:

These asian beetles were all over, we had to call my mom's friend, Jerry, the bug guy. They were incredibly bad, all over in my big brother's room. I have this big brother, and he couldn't even read in his room because they'd land on his lips and hair and he was starting to get really mad. But my dad didn't want to pay a bug guy to come to the house so my mom taped up my brother's windows with mailing tape to catch them cuz she read to do that.

It didn't work, and when the bug guy came and saw what she did, we were standing under the tape trap my mom made by the big windows and the bug guy pulled the tape off and holy cow! it was like rain. Really gross rain. And like 50,000 crunchy dried up old bugs landed on the carpet and I couldn't even walk around in there because it was like an asian beetle landmine.

I have like 4 more big stories: but my mom will only let me do one more. Which is too bad because the stories I have are really good. I'll do them next week, though.

My mom says I can't say ANY NAMES about this next story. So, I'll call it:

"When my mom made me go to this one kid's house.":

My mom always feels sorry for people, and just cuz she feels sorry for them, we're the ones that have to do the good stuff for them. Like, go over to their house. Which I did.

This one kid, he had no friends (you'll see why later) and my mom said, "Honey, you need to go over and be nice to him because he has no friends." So, I said, "No" because I know what that usually means. It usually means I find out why the kid has no friends.

So, she makes me go. I get there, the kid comes to the door with his mom and his mom is all smiley and "hi there" but the kid just runs and hides. So, I stay, and the mom makes the kid come out to play with me and the kid says, (and this was so weird ) "do you want to go to SeaWorld?" And, me, I feel mixed up and don't know what to say, so I say"uhhh....suuuuure (gulp)."

So, then, the kid runs to the bathroom and grabs a bucket from the bathtub, and I think "uh oh" and I follow him, and then he goes to his room AND THROWS THE BUCKET THAT'S FULL OF PLASTIC DOLPHINS AND WHALES on the floor! And then the kid's like "It's SeaWorld!" and I'm just like......... I wanted to ask the mom when I would go home but, then, I knew that wouldn't be very nice.

Then, he wanted to play "Aliens" and that's not the worst part. So, he grabbed like all these 20 dollar tubes (at Shopko they're 20 dollars, I don't know about Target) of MartianMatter and then the kid said, "grab a bottle!" but I didn't want to because I know how much that stuff costs, so I just let him do it , and he ran outside and squirted all the bottles at once on a big rock outside of his house and said "It's an Alien now!" and started to hit it with a stick. I really wanted to go home right away then.

The mom asked me to stay for a snack first. And then the kid wanted to make us soup! He filled a bucket full of water, and then began squirting in some Purell from this big Purell thing from Costco or something it was so big and then sticks and leaves and raspberries and grapes that he got from inside the house. And he even threw in some Cheerios. And then he spilled it down his slide on purpose.

Then I saw my mom come and I ran to the van. She started to laugh really hard when she saw me keep pulling on the van door and the door was still locked.

Bye.

62 comments:

  1. oh.my.goodness. baby-e....child! you are hilarious. nice post. nice jammas. and...you are a nice boy for trying to play with mr. sea world alien boy. kindness is always a good thing. most adults don't have that one down yet. good job!!! :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Baby E you are probably my favourite blogger! I cannot wait to see your new PJs, if they work and they really do make you feel like a teenager then I want some too (because I want to feel like a teenager again), so make sure to say where you got them. Also it was really nice that you went and played with that kid, eventhough he was weird. Look on the bright side by the time you are grown up you will be an expert at dealing with weird people, something that grown-ups have to do all the time! I also think you are pretty cool for keeping a journal!

    ReplyDelete
  3. pajamas that make hime look like a teenager, how cute! This kid is so funny...come on, why not let him do all three stories? he's a great little entertainer!

    ReplyDelete
  4. It is hard to be so kind to those that are marked as different, but I am sure glad he tried. Baby E might be the turning point for that kid. (At least he didn't make Baby E eat the soup for a snack!)
    Enjoy the day!
    Erin

    ReplyDelete
  5. "My mom says I can't say ANY NAMES about this next story. So, I'll call it "When my mom made me go this one kid's house.""

    ahahaha! I giggled all the way through this one. Too funny! Mom, you should know better than to force your son on weird kids you feel sorry for. Poor kid. I can imagine being afraid of what games that kid was going to think of next. ahahahahaa!

    Your clever little guy is very well spoken. Good job!

    ReplyDelete
  6. i guess one of these days i will stop wearing my spidermans too...

    good job being nice to the kid...you probably made his year...but i would be very afraid...lol.

    ReplyDelete
  7. oh this was hilarious, i was confused at first hahahaha, im still new to your blog, please forgive me!
    your a crack up and thank you for your advice btw :)

    xoxo
    sara

    ReplyDelete
  8. Love it! Baby E., you're a trooper for going over to the kid's house. It is true - this is good training for the future when you will be stuck with "weird" people and the nice thing is that you did something pretty terrific for that kid. He will remember how nice you were, even if you may choose to block this memory from your mind forever.

    Can't wait to see your teenage pajamas - I can't imagine what those could be?!?

    Nice visual about the bug landing on your brother's lip, by the way.

    Say hi to your mom for me :-)

    ReplyDelete
  9. Baby E,
    I'm a big fan of the Spidermans (Especially the wings/cape part) but I am willing to keep an open mind about the new PJs.
    The bug thing sounds cool except for the bugs "on his lips" part. Not cool.
    You're nice.

    ReplyDelete
  10. That was great. I did get the heebie jeebies, though, when you were talking about your brother having Asian beetles all over his face while he was reading. Icky poo! But I totally see why you didn't really want to play with that kid, even though it was really nice that you did. Some people's idea of fun is just tooooo much to swallow. Hopefully you didn't have to stay and pick up the mess HE made! That would be too unfair.

    Awesome post, dude. Can't wait to see the new jams. ;) My middle guy has chopper PJs and he thinks they are awesome.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Can't wait to see the new PJs.

    ReplyDelete
  12. oh man, you mean I've got to stop wearing my spidermans? I'll bet if you wore them over to the next scary kid's house, he'd let you go home before you had to eat purell soup...

    ReplyDelete
  13. Baby E certainly has writing talent. I can't help feeling sorry for the little kid he visited, so hopefully Baby E going to play was a good day for him.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Aw,Baby E...too big for the Spider Mans, I'd be sad too. I know how your Mom feels because I cried when I saw Barbies camper in the trash.
    I'm looking forward to seeing the new ones though! Now I also know why no one ever wanted to play at our house...;)Looking forward to next week and the rest of your stories!

    ReplyDelete
  15. I look forward to BabyE's post! Bug on your brother's lips... cool.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Oh no...too funny. Bugs ewww, hope its under control now. Too true how we always make our kids be the good Samaritan in situations we would probably say no too. He's really getting good at collecting all the good juicy stuff. Can't wait for more secrets from the Castle!
    Dana

    ReplyDelete
  17. They sure do outgrow their spidermans fast, don't they? Love that you have a blogging helper!

    ReplyDelete
  18. Thank goodness for Jerry the Bug Guy. Ew, ew, ew. Not even my Spidermans could make me brave enough to handle those icky creatures!

    ReplyDelete
  19. He did his good deed, Mom. Can he have some ice cream please? I hope you are having a wonderful day and that the teenage PJ's weren't to upsetting. Blessings...Mary

    ReplyDelete
  20. I love this. Where have you been my whole life? I love that you make Baby E friend kids who have no friends...and there's a reason the kid has no friends.

    I love that you run an empire and wear your crown proudly when you are cleaning toilets.

    I am so happy to find you right back.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Baby E, I'm not afraid of bugs, because I have a lot of brothers and they taught me not to be afraid, but that story scares the heck out of me.

    And I wear Tinkerbelle pajamas and I'm a grownup with my own bunch of kids.

    And it was so very nice of you to play with that little boy. I do think he sounds a little weird and the thing is, he probably doesn't have any friends. And someday he'll grow up and remember that he had a friend in you. Kindness is everything. I tell my girls that all the time.

    You did a great job, today. I loved it.

    ReplyDelete
  22. That is hilarious and adorable! I laughed out loud at work when I saw "this is the part where I find out why he doesn't have any friends."

    Awesome!

    ReplyDelete
  23. I would love to wear Spidermans but they just don't make them in my size...

    Totally grossed out by the bugs. That's just uber-yucky. Then again, I'm something of a wuss. When I see a bug, my heart starts racing and I get all girly and pitiful. It's sad.

    ReplyDelete
  24. I cannot wait to see your new pjs that make you feel like a teenager. cool!

    and the beetles...ICKY!!! I'm glad the bug guy came over.

    I was a little sad when I was reading about the kid. I know alot of kids that sound like him. He may seem different but it's only because his mind may work differently and he sees things to play as fun that most may
    not. So if you can, try and be nice to him and maybe invite him to your house. He may have trouble making friends because of the way his mind works. He may be really, really smart about one thing or know alot about one topic.

    you are doing a great job! can't wait to hear more stories!!

    ReplyDelete
  25. Never a dull moment, right?

    I get the part about being sad about those Spidermans...I remember when my son was packing for Youth Camp (as in high school) and I asked, "Did you pack your jammies?" What a look I got!

    ReplyDelete
  26. Baby E: Being a teenager is totally overrated. Wear those Spidermans for your mama. It makes her happy.

    ReplyDelete
  27. I was just reading "Diary of a Wimpy Kid" earlier today, and I feel like I'm still reading it. Love it!

    Are Asian Beetles the same thing as Ladybugs are in Alabama? Because we have that same problem. Happens on the SAME DAY of every year. They're bizarre little creatures...

    ReplyDelete
  28. I wish I had pjs that made me feel like a teenager!

    Good for you for hanging out with a lonely boy. Kindness rocks.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Beetle invasion - the real Spiderman would've to string a big web to stop them :-)

    Lovely post :-)

    ReplyDelete
  30. Baby E needs his own blog. Very cute!

    ReplyDelete
  31. Baby E, you're such a great storyteller! We also had Asian beetles in my neighborhood up here in Canada - we even had to cut down all our maple trees :( not pretty. Anyway, I am so looking forward to your new tales next week & hope you find some pj's you & your mom will both love!

    ReplyDelete
  32. Love it, as usual. I started reading Diary of a Wimpy Kid today, and it had that same line about, it's not a diary, it's a journal! So funny! :)

    ReplyDelete
  33. Ha ha! Seaworld! That is so funny.

    ReplyDelete
  34. Baby E,
    great job.
    Next time you go to your new friends house, just remember that he has an overdeveloped imagination with a slightly destructive streak, and wear your spidermans and every time he tells you to do something weird, say "I can't I'm spiderman, now quick! Bring me a cookie before the city is taken over by crime"

    ReplyDelete
  35. I enjoyed your blog very much

    ReplyDelete
  36. I don't think my belly can hold all these laughs!!! Baby E, you're a great kid for listening to your mom and trying to be nice to some kid (even if he's a bit weird).

    ReplyDelete
  37. HYSTERICAL!!!!!!! He needs his own video blog!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  38. Wow. About the kid, (I won't tell his name too) maybe he was my classmate. He must have traveled back in time! We played Aliens too, though I was the one behind naming them.
    Awesome post, Baby E. Good job. Looks like, I better give away my Spiderman costume... LOL

    Toodles!

    ReplyDelete
  39. awww, keep wearing the spidey jammies, it will make momma feel better. (my 11 year old wears them!) I will miss it when my little one who is 3 outgrows his superman jammies.

    ReplyDelete
  40. I love the Asian beetle story. So they still think your tape didn't work, huh?

    ReplyDelete
  41. It is always a good thing to be nice to the kids who don't have any friends. Later in life you will see that it paid off.

    I'm not such a fan of bugs myself, but Spiderman is cool.

    Happy to read your post this week!

    ReplyDelete
  42. Re: the comment you left on my blog: send me your e-mail and I'll send the query. Don't worry about hurting my feelings, if you don't like it, just let me know. :)

    ReplyDelete
  43. Ah Baby E., you put into words what us grown ups are too scared to say! Those SpiderMan p.j.'s made me think of my boy's old Batman p.j.'s---he had a cape, too. Just think of how between the 2 of you you all could save the world. You could even use those dead bugs from your brother's room as ammunition! Looking forward to your visit again next week!

    ReplyDelete
  44. Alright, seriously, this keeps happening to me!! Am I being shunned??? I commented on this yesterday, & it's not here! Happened over at the Mombshelter & a few other places too lately....what am I doing wrong???!!!

    ANywho, the gist of it was that Baby E did another fab job, & I appreciate him pointing out the error of my Mommy ways, for I too make my kids play with weird lonely kids....but kindness will always come to you, keep the faith!

    :-D

    ReplyDelete
  45. There is a place in heaven for Baby E...and his mom. I love that you have to play with them. Such a nice boy, and such nice Spiderman attire!

    By the way, your majesty, next time I'm back in LA I will totally hit those restaurants with cookbook in hand! So excited! Thanks for the tip.

    Lots of yummy love,
    Alex aka Ma What's for Dinner
    www.mawhats4dinner.com

    ReplyDelete
  46. Baby E., you learned a great lesson that sometimes, we have to be nice to people who are HARD to be nice to. That's a sign that you're growing up! Good job!

    ReplyDelete
  47. At some point in your life Spidermans become cool again, and you don't have to play with strange children and their Aliens.

    Or so I'm told.

    ReplyDelete
  48. holy shite! like seriously holy shite that was freaking amazing! i need to meet this kid!!!

    and dude, my mom was such a friend pusher too. there are some creep show kids out there. i'm glad he didn't make your son eat the soup.

    i'm off to go play sea world now.

    ReplyDelete
  49. Bless his heart. I need some pajamas that make me feel like a teenager. Where do you get those kind? ;)

    ReplyDelete
  50. Had to smile at this one! I'm also a Mom that sends my girls over to a playdate they are truly not keen on. Well done Mom, I think we are teaching compassion, and they get to learn about ummmm the other SeaWorld.

    ReplyDelete
  51. Dear Baby E.

    I have been reading blogs for the last HOUR. And yours?? TOTALLY THE BEST. Not only FUNNY! But you also told me where to get things like giant containers of Purell! And we? Could use a LOT of Purell.

    My Little Man can't talk yet. All he does is grunt. (Yes, baby's usually coo. But mine grunts. I don't know why.) I hope when he does start talking he's as funny as you are!

    High Five!
    -Meg

    ReplyDelete
  52. I hope that you are having fun today,
    it is hard to have mutual understanding when it comes to relations, yet you have tried hard...fun post,
    Happy Tuesday!

    ReplyDelete
  53. Baby E! Can I have your pajamas if you are all done with them?

    Love your blog and you did the right thing by going to that kid's house!

    ReplyDelete
  54. Great stories Baby E! Glad that Mondays are yours.
    My son had those same jammies and has now moved up to the older style with just trucks and baseball decor on them.
    Spider-Man is my second favorite super hero, second only to Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
    That was very nice that you gave that kid a chance to be your friend.

    ReplyDelete
  55. Baby E, You are fabulous and brilliant. Fabulous because you played with someone who needed a friend, even when they were really hard to play with. And brilliant because you can make a bunch of adult's days just by being YOU!

    ReplyDelete
  56. "And guess what? The new pajamas I have now make me feel like a teenager." Sooooooo cute! Baby E, you are adorable. I love love love your posts!!!

    ReplyDelete
  57. Awesome. I have three boyz and they keep life interesting.
    I homeschooled them every year until this year and they tried a small charter school( 3rd grader only half days) and 6th grader its a school big on the arts, etc-- working out ok. But I really miss having them home--we had fun and learned a lot.

    ReplyDelete
  58. Oh, he needs to give lessons to other kids! I hope that my kids will be just like that - playing with the kids that are hard to play with. It shows such a big heart!

    Newest follower here!

    ReplyDelete
  59. Hello to all: I apologize for not getting here sooner. Life is interfering with my blog (-:

    I jest!

    Seriously: thank you to ALL for being faithful to BABY E.

    He truly takes this seriously. He has the notebook, and takes notes.

    Oh, this is going to be such the memory for me.

    You are all wonderful people. Thank you for thrilling him.

    Bless you all!

    THANK YOU To Taming Insanity for his sunshine award ! Baby E's first Ev-AH!

    And thank you to Cheryl@Deckside Thoughts, for his bloggy award, too.

    How cool are you, ladies???

    ReplyDelete
  60. i loved this! Baby E, my husband wears lucky charms pajamas and he is 37. Don't tell him I told you though. New follower sent over from Alabaster Cow.

    ReplyDelete

LinkWithin

Related Posts with Thumbnails