1. I like to laugh a lot. Especially videos on youtube about people slipping. On anything. A quick look at my viewing youtube history will show you a lot of reasons I'm going to hell.
2. I used to be in love with pineapple until I became allergic. I could slam down 15 pina coladas like nobody's business. A fact that many a beau from my past turned into a dealbreaker.
3. In my youth, I secretly wished to be a horse.
4. I like to come up with new ways to walk. Sometimes I swing my hips more, other days I try to walk straight without moving.
5. I love reading big, fat books. "Ox-stunners" as my history teacher used to call them.
6. I never let my kids get the screen time they ask for.
7. I'm afraid that in five years we're going to find out that rainbow loom bands are toxic.
8. Some part of my body hurts every day.
9. I just decided to make this list 37 things.
10. I will always sneak out for ice cream. Especially "birthday cake" flavor. I just say I'm going out for a walk.
11. I have no problem sneaking out to matinees by myself. I just say I'm going to throw the garbage out.
12. I sneak out a lot. My family finds me missing a lot. (traumatized? maybe. I do hear them randomly shouting MOM??! every now and then)
13. I like to watch the Twilight Zone every night. I force my children to do it with me using screen time as leverage.
14. I love coffee but it makes me sick. It's like Little Timmy who ate strawberries every day even though he was allergic.
15. Winter makes me sad. It's like an old lady just giving up. (The maudlin first appears at 59 degrees)
16. I go for a walk every day to stay fit. I have adjusted my idea of fit as time marches on. I tried to do push ups but my kids told me my form was horrible because I was too weak and they padded me on the shoulder and told me to give up.
17. When I wear my squeaky Croc sandals it sounds like birds are following me. I have ornithophobia so it makes for a stressful walk.
18. I'm afraid of birds and loose dogs. Cujophobia.
19. I'm not a dog person, per se, is as polite as I can be about it.
20. Public radio is my friend and I talk to it all day.
21. My only friend in grade school was Rod Serling.
22. I can fall asleep anywhere, anytime, anyhow. Just show me a spot. I don't know why children resist sleep. If someone pointed me to a dark corner and gave me a pillow and a blanket you wouldn't hear a wail out of me.
23. I always sneeze two times in a row.
24. I make my children try some pretty crazy recipes.
25. I'm the one who eats all the Oreos from the store. I act like I can't hear when the kids ask.
26. I fiddle with my hair when I'm worried until I look like Operaman.
27. I dream in color. My husband dreams in black and white. I think he's missing cones in his brain.
28. When I go for walks I bring along my umbrellas to use as momentum boosters because they're less embarrassing than ski poles. Like my husband says, "This isn't England, you know."
29. I try to plan the best walking route to avoid as many dogs as possible. And the birds in the park.
30. People will always be interesting to me.
31. I stare at things and either fall all the way in love or to the bottom of the well grossness with them. Trees: in love. Mushrooms: grossiosity.
32. If I had had a daughter, I would have named her Pascal.
33. Patsy Cline will always be my favorite.
34. Red Skelton will always be my favorite.
35. I can't concentrate and don't feel right if I don't have earrings on.
36. I could eat spaghetti and meatballs for breakfast, lunch, dinner and second breakfast.
37. I love to play catch.
BONUS: Dimmer light switches make me angry.
Surprise Bonus: Dim lights make me crabby.
Super Surprise: A light switch should either be on or off. Make dimmers illegal.
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