Saturday, November 21, 2015

Friday Night Frozen Pizza Review: Session One

Clinton was president the last time we had frozen cheese pizza in our house.

Our kids were diagnosed with a dairy allergy when they were little and since outside they'd be living with a restricted diet I didn't want them to live that way at home, so as far as they knew, everyone in the house ate the same. This worked, and bonus feature: the adults in the house had low cholesterol low blood pressure good weight control in the process. Win win for everybody. We switched to dairy-free which wasn't so bad BUT it wasn't cheese.

One of our kids, Auggie, was just cleared of a dairy allergy two months ago and we have been heavy into lightly introducing cheese into our house. You can do both extremes, people, despite what the internet tries to tell you about only feeling one thing at one time.

We have joined America with the weekend frozen cheese pizza and a movie! We were already into the movie part because we're couch slugs like that but no more hot bread and tomato sauce composites. Can you hear me shouting from joy over there? Probably not because I'm not the yahoo-ing type. Instead I'm just smiling really big.

Tonight we sampled a new frozen pizza and I spun around mid-chomp, popping my arthritic knees in the process, but I was just so damn excited at my idea I moved quicker than my body could stop me and I shouted HEY LET'S DO A WEEKLY FROZEN PIZZA REVIEW!

Whatever, mom, sure.
Grunt Chew Grunt
Hey - This one's GOOD

And in the same way that all good ideas are born, with the sound of a light bulb going on - or a cracked knee, our weekly cheese pizza review was born.

This weeks' frozen brand was DiGiorno's Original Rising Crust - Four Cheese
Four cheese because see above what I said about the heavy light - we can do it, people.

* * *
Here is Auggie with his Friday Night Frozen Pizza Review:

I picked out this pizza because when we were reading the boxes in the store that self rising part tempted me. I got home and opened the box and preheated the oven but asking my mom first if we could put it at the high temperature it said to. The house smelled awesome! I liked how it was called special rising crust something.

You put it in the oven and the crust got all airy. You could see it rise by itself!

We took it out and it was gushy and you sunk your teeth into it and the cheese got all in your mouth.

THAT made it a lot more delicious.

I liked how it was layered, bread on the bottom and after that and there's a secret hidden tomato layer and you had a pocket of cheese over.

It was pretty easy to cut and didn't go back and forth like when you have to press hard with that pizza we had last week that mostly just cracked like crackers.

It wasn't like some cheeses that leave a pretty bad after taste -- this pizza was good. The box said it was super healthy if you cut it into six pieces: super healthier if you cut it into four pieces like we did for a block of pizza with calcium and protein.

Aftertaste is everything.

I liked it. Really filling, not too salty. Like didn't leave you dying for water.

Rating: I can only give it a 3.5 out of 5 because not 5 because it's like dating. I just started and what if there's better ones out there.

There you have it. Not exactly Friday Night Lights, but it'll do, pig, it'll do.

 **Here's some fun news! Something I wrote about the 'joy' of teens in the house is published over at the amazing Scary Mommy site, "How Living with Teens is Like Losing Your Mind." Click over, and as always, I promise I'll help you feel better about your life. 

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