Monday, November 28, 2011

What I Missed By Not Black Fridaying It

This year, due to financial instabilities of the economy within the world of this household, we decided to not be part of the Black Friday money saving madness. *spending to save is still spending*

We're crazy, I know, because who wouldn't want two flat screen TVs when they're BOGO?

Because of me staying home the day after Thanksgiving in my well worn mismatched pajamas, sipping on Your Store Brand Here coffee by the steamy mugful, Value Deal Bing crooning in the background, I missed out on these sorts of deals:

Getting my face pepper sprayed for touching someone else's coveted doorbuster Xbox.

Being trampled underneath while lined up customers duck underneath a lifting store gate.

Carried away in a sea of humanity over $2 waffle irons.

Climbing into vats of sweet potatoes to get that video game.

And before you smugly think, Oh, this only happens at Walmart and Best Buy, here's a hipster crowd at Urban Outfitters, where the theft detector devices get trampled down in the insane gates opening dash.


This holiday, reject the spirit of greed and consumerism: and not just because of the economy, do it for your family. Teach them that the holidays are about sharing. A holiday season without any thought for the poor is an impoverished holiday. 

Think about this: 1 in 4 children in America goes to bed hungry because of unemployment, neediness, the mental and physical health of their caretakers. Can you imagine trying to fall asleep hungry? These children do, every night.


FeedingAmerica.org helps you to feed these children. For as little as $21, you can feed a hungry family for 2 weeks. You decide whether your donation is used on a local or a national level. If you're not able to donate, you can volunteer to help. If you want to find out about food program eligibility, for you or someone else, you can click here.

Please, today, click over and learn more about FeedingAmerica. You don't have to decide to give anything, just read the stories there. Follow them on twitter, friend them on FB.

Take your time, there's no mad dash, no one's going to pepper spray you. You can do it all from the comfort of your safe home, in your pj's, hot steamy mug in hand--return home from your virtual tour without a black and blue mark on you.


Thank you.

47 comments:

  1. I stayed home in my pajamas drinking coffee, too! I don't like to shop on a normal day, much less THAT day. Oddly enough, I don't feel like I missed out on anything.

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  2. I think it's great you're giving a shout out to a worthy organization! Boo consumerism.

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  3. Awesome as always, my Empress!

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  4. What a wake up call here, Alexandra! I admit it's easy to forget about the less-fortunate especially amidst the festivities of Thanksgiving and Black Friday shopping madness. You are right to bring this message at this time. Amazing how for as little as $21 you can feed a hungry family for weeks--a meager amount compared to what we usually spent while on a shopping spree.

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  5. Excellent perspective. And I love "sea of humanity."

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  6. Amen. I felt mortified watching the throngs of Black Friday crazies, not because of their intense, stabby need for a deal (we all like those), but because it was just GROSS to think about all the children who will wake up with nothing under their tree and no food in their belly while these lunatics get violent over a superfluous WAFFLE IRON. Waffles aren't even *that* good. Greedy greedmongers.

    Thank you for this post.

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  7. OMG- those videos are terrifying! I've never seen anything like that around here. But then again, I have never ever ever gone shopping on Thanksgiving. A $2 waffle iron just isn't worth the trouble.

    Speaking of which, did you see the woman who practically lost her pants over that waffle iron? Butt crack in a crowd is NOT PRETTY.

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  8. insane...people are crazy...and saw today where like 52 million was spent...where are they getting the money...that pepper spray lady was insane too...

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  9. What a great message to send after a weekend that really left me scratching my head. It seems to get worse and worse each year, and I just can't understand how things like this happen. Pepperspray?! Or the poor older man going into cardiac arrest while people stampeded around him to get bargain prices?

    Something's gotta change. And it's important always to remember those less fortunate, especially this time of year. XOXO

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  10. Thank you for this. I've never done Black Friday. This year, though, my daughter's birthday fell on Thanksgiving and she wanted to spend her gift cards and money on Black Friday. We did go out, but only to the Gap and not until nearly 11. It was a normal Friday afternoon -- no pushing or shoving -- for which I am grateful (though I still have no desire to be one of those 4 a.m.-ers). Unfortunately, she was dismayed that she didn't receive the items she requested for her birthday (one of which is an iPod Touch: $200. Um, you're 11 and I think you might be high). I've been trying to figure out how to show her REALLY SHOW HER about the less fortunate and how gifts should not be our priority during the holiday season (or at all). So again, thanks; I'll be sharing the site with her this evening to figure out how to volunteer.

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  11. Some people are nuts. You, however, are not. This is a great cause.

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  12. I was at home with hot tea and cranberry orange muffins. (very yummy by the way)

    The Black Friday craziness seemed especially crazy this year. Actually it seems to be getting worse every year. Sad.

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  13. Bravo here in Canada we don't have those and awesome sales and I'm shocked often at how people behave when a deal is to be had

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  14. Thank you so much for lending your voice. I love the way you presented this.

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  15. The crazy part about all of this is that sometimes the deals amount to like $11 in savings. Is it worth being trampled?! Are slipper-socks, or snuggies, or pajama jeans REALLY that important?! Personally, I only agree to being trampled for the opportunity to hold hands with Justin Timberlake. Or just smell his hands. I'd probably be okay with getting trampled for that too. Thanks for sharing a more useful way to spend your money.

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  16. I can't believe you posted this because I watched 60 Minutes last night and saw a segment on homeless children living in trucks in Florida (and okay, the main reason I watched 60 minutes was because of the Angelina Jolie interview and her saying she's still all bad and stuff, except now Brad owns it - whatever the hell that means..)but the story about kids was tough to watch.

    I will check out this charity.

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  17. There is no Black Friday here as there is no Thanksgiving. Plus, nothing is ever ever cheap.

    Thank you for bringing up the poor.

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  18. Amen, amen, amen!

    Feeding America does great work in my community. Thank you for reminding us of the messages that our own priorities send to our kids.

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  19. About a week before Thanksgiving I was down at my sister's and ran into one of her friends, the one who's helping us usher and seat all the people for Mom's big surprise party on the 2nd.

    I asked her how she was and she said she was FABULOUS and HAPPY and WASN'T LIFE GRAND? I said, "Well, I wish everyone felt like that, but there are some people in Haiti and Japan who probably don't."

    And she said, "Well, you can't worry about the rest of the world."

    Mercifully I kept my big mouth shut (because of her help for the party) but I wanted to say, WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU??? This woman is filthy rich, filthy filthy.

    The entire conversation depressed me.

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  20. Great point!! I watched the news of Black Friday madness from the comfort of my own home. Granted I didn't have any plans to fly to the States to participate.

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  21. what an incredibly thoughtful post. it's not easy to refrain from shopping. when i had money, i enjoyed spending on the ones i love. i love the bustle, the spirit of many people together. but i think that taking a reasonable step back, as you are doing, is the sort of really important protest this world benefits from. i marched in the street at occupy l.a. last night and i'm proud of that. i will not sit idly by as wealth is redistributed upward and we are told too bad-- that's how the world is. yet i strongly suspect that families leaning back from participating in the breakneck shopping culture the elites have promoted is even more important. i come here to enjoy your witty stories, but i also learn plenty about good parenting.

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  22. We were at that mall with the Urban Outfitters stampede, but luckily that was over before we got there.

    I didn't buy anything that night. I just find it fascinating to see how many people are out en masse to buy a bunch of stuff they don't need, just because it's cheaper than usual. And I'm constantly amazed at how many people use Black Friday to buy stuff for themselves, rather than for others.

    You're absolutely right. There are so many better things our money can go toward.

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  23. I like a good anti-Black Friday post. I have no problem with holiday sales, but Black Friday seems to do love causing mass hysteria (and is even encouraged) and that scares the crap out of me.

    Feeding American seems like a great organization, and I'm glad to see you plug them for the holidays.

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  24. Wouldn't it be great if by checking out FeedingAmerica, someone who needs food, gets fed. Someone who wants to become involved, can be. And someone who knows of a friend struggling right now, can provide a resource?

    And what if we all feed a family for 2 wks? Wouldn't that be great?

    Thanks for checking them out, I like how I can help locally.

    Have a wonderful holiday season....you're all such great people.

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  25. Thank you for this post. And yes. To all of it.

    Several years ago, my family (parents/sister/grandparents/aunts & uncles) decided to forego exchanging Christmas presents because

    A. We already have everything we really need
    B. We were pointlessly trading gift cards without meaning
    C. We wanted the season to be about something more than "getting stuff."

    So instead, we now donate money to various charities throughout the year on each other's behalf. I try to match the cause to the person and then write something up to give out on Christmas explaining my choice.

    I can't tell you how much happier I am these days knowing that my blessings are spreading elsewhere.

    And that no one ever gets trampled buying me gifts.

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  26. Amen! Hear, hear! High-five! Belly-buck!

    Um, I agree.

    XO

    A.

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  27. I never forget those families or children, esp at this time of the year when we who have a little extra can help, can heal, can make a heart happy. This was a gorgeous reminder to all of us...I love to shop but I'll be damned if I'm going out on Black FRIDAY for anything...my time at home is more imp, the light in my sonsk eyes brighter than any sale for sure.

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  28. I avoid Black Friday at all costs. Thanks for the link.

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  29. Amen to that.
    People forget that the most important thing during the holidays (it should be all year round) is to help others who are in need. I'm actually going to miss working at the hospital. We used to adopt the most neediest families that walked through our ER doors. It was such a rewarding experience seeing a Mom get a new winter coat and a dinner to feed her family for the holidays. The best was giving the toys to the kids though. In those smiles, magic resided.
    That's what Christmas is about.

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  30. --I agree.

    The greed is unbearable & embarrassing.

    I like your perspective and priorities... :)

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  31. We Americans must look like the greediest SOBs ever after this most recent Black Friday. People in so many other countries don't have near the amount of STUFF that we have, and we're nearly killing each other to buy more stuff.

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  32. Our priest talked about the pepper spray incident yesterday. Totally appalling. What are people thinking? Or are they?

    Great message. Even if the videos behind it are disturbing about our culture.

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  33. I worked far too many years in retail to ever go out on Black Friday! People are crazy!

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  34. Thank you so much for this post! We put our Christmas trees up early, since we had company coming for Thanksgiving, and all of a sudden it hit me that this was what Christmas would be like if we did it without all the gift craziness: Just family enjoying spending time together, sharing meals, playing games, taking a break from the rush of everyday life to just be together.

    We already help with food drives for Loaves & Fishes, a local charity for homeless children, and Salvation Army Christmas stockings; Feeding America sounds like another wonderful way to share our blessings this year. It never ceases to amaze me that buying lots of "stuff" for ourselves just makes us want more and more that we can't have, and makes us feel needy and empty. Sharing as much as we can spare to help others is the only way to come through the Christmas season feeling blessed and spiritually whole.

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  35. I didn't mention this in the post, but for a $50 donation to our WI foodbank, I am able to provide 250 meals.

    Isn't that amazing?

    250 people fed, from a 50 dollar donation.

    Thanks to this organization.

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  36. I think it's wonderful that you are helping people find a way to help those in need. This is a great way to refocus everybody's attention towards the kind of behavior the holiday season is supposed to inspire: being thankful for what we have and giving to others.

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  37. I do agree. I never leave the house on black Friday or that entire weekend to be exact. I was dismayed at the behavior that I saw on the news. There is so much wrong about it. FA sounds like a great organization. Much better than brawling for electronics as a way to give!

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  38. Here's something cool: I let my 3 kids donate to feed a family in our state for 2 wks: one period for each child.

    They got a kick out of it, and a real sense of pride.

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  39. Thanks so much for the link! I was trying to decide what and where to donate this year---I think sometimes that might be what finally pushes me over into having some holiday spirit!

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  40. Oooh - Like the kids taking ownership of it. Borrowing that idea. Thank you. :)

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  41. So true. All I can do is shake my head when I hear tales of that kind of insanity. No consumer good is worth that.

    I will definitely click over!

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  42. Thank you. You just helped me start and finish my Christmas shopping. For years I've tried to talk my huband's family into doing charitable donations in lieu of gifts. It was shot down by...my husband.

    But now, they're my soon-to-be-EX husband's family and I get to make my own rules. From my children, they'll receive the gift of knowing other children are not going to bed hungry.

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  43. I'm not the only one to say this, but the irony is astounding: let's be grateful for what we have on Thursday, then try to kill each other for stuff we "need" on Friday. WTF? Thank you for an elegant and important post.

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  44. I love your holiday spirit. And you.

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  45. We've got a couple of policies here: if you want new things for the holidays, you have to donate what you can to others who have less. (Win-win. We make room, clean up, and give away a lot.) And I match every dollar she donates with nine, so she can help pick charities. But I read about a great idea that I'm going to try this year. This parent gives her kids money for their final present (for Chanukah, but easily adaptable) with the stipulation that they have to donate it to the charity of their choice. The mom said her kids consider it their favorite present. I'd be happy with grumbling, so long as it becomes a tradition.

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  46. Excellent.

    I had to buy a dryer, but I went to a local shop and so while I technically shopped on Black Friday, it was less about SALE SALE SALE and more about I NEED DRY CLOTHES.

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